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Be Patient, You Asshat.

Be Patient, You Asshat.

I’m feeling feisty.

Alas, I’m writing on the art of patience, so passion is needed.

Truthfully, I’ve been wanting to write on this topic for a while. I’ve been good patient, however. ;-O

Now, the Universe is calling me to write on this because so many people are fucking impatient.

Especially in today’s satisfaction-quick-fix-driven world, being patient is certainly an art. It’s also hard. It’s shitty. It’s monotonous. It’s the last thing we want to hear. It’s NOT sexy.

Well, I got news for you: this is how life works. Life is not a robotic Siri on your iPhone that will give you all the answers with the press of a button and a request on command.

Doesn’t work that way.

Rather, life flows as it pleases, tosses twists and turns, and throws adversity and gut wrenching shit in your face. Simply put, it moves at its own rate.

Life doesn’t give a fuck what you think. Life doesn’t give a fuck what you want. Life doesn’t give a fuck how quickly you want XYZ to happen.


And I see this ALL the time in performance, fitness, and career pursuits.

Some days, I get requests from parents to get their kid faster in a month’s time (read this article on the process of speed development here).

Some days, I get asked to help someone lose 10 pounds in 2 weeks.

And some days, I get asked by bloggers to help them get 10,000 followers in their first year of writing articles.

And some days, I get asked by my girlfriends to help them find “the one” ASAP.

My response: “be patient, asshat.”

Does this sound offensive?

Awesome. I love offending people.

But it’s a call from the bottom of my heart: in order to become the best version of yourself, whether this is in athletics, fitness, life, or business, you have to be hit with harsh reality.

And reality is: things take time. A lot of fucking time.


So buckle up.

This is life.

Too often, people chase immediate dreams, and fail to enjoy the unfolding process of life – the oscillations, the “oh shit” moments, the joys, the elated highs, the stomach knotting lows. They want to get right to the fairy tale ending, without facing the Wicked Witch of the West.

This type of challenge, however, is needed. When we embrace life’s textures, detours, and villains, we embrace ourselves.

So, in order to improve ourselves, we must learn to face unexpected mudslides while climbing the mountain of life.

Things, to that end, get muddy all the time.

But you know what? Sometimes, our best work arises out of the muddiness. We lean into it, and say, “thank you Universe for giving me this experience to dig harder next time.”

Every bad moment, to that end, turns into a delight from the Universe that propels you further up the mountain.

Personally speaking, if I started blogging with the stringent mindset of garnering thousands of readers off the bat, I wouldn’t have put forth my best work.

Instead, I accepted I was in it for the long-haul, and continued to relentlessly put out amazing content and readable articles with profanity, pop culture references, and radical calls to action that made people question their existence.

I was patient for 3 fucking years.

And still am.

Little did I know when I started out, I would move on to be featured in Women’s Health, Livestrong, Shape, and Stack. But again, this was a 3 year process, which is still, to this day, going on.

Do I have other writing aspirations for the future? Absolutely. But I’ve been operating more and more under a present moment mindset, and writing weekly content that ignites my soul. The result? I’m still successful as hell.

Maybe it will lead to something larger than life. Maybe it won’t. As long as I’m immersed in my heart space, life is pretty freaking cool.

Taking the conversation back to performance and fitness, the process is the pleasure.

Remember when you couldn’t get your first Pull-Up?

Moreover, remember the tiny steps you took along the way to achieve your first one? The early mornings, the accessory movements, the mental focus, the mental barriers, the tweaking of your program? The burning eccentrics? The coldness of chains on your back? That’s what it’s all about.

Which reminds me: not too long ago I made an analogy between the process of fitness goals and a night out of drinking.

When we go out for a night of drinking, it’s not the hangover end result that matters the next day. It’s the shenanigans. The stories. The wild fucking times leading up to that shitty morning. The we-went-to-a-strip-club-and-then-went-to-the-24-hour-diner-and-danced-on-the-tables-and-ordered-cheese-steaks-and-made-out-with-our-crush type shit.

That’s the good stuff right there.

That’s the process.

That’s being patient and not knowing what’s going to unfold.

A successful life is a life with patience. It’s facing the adversities with fervor, but it’s also knowing life will always work in our favor.

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